Archive - Bearcat - 12th Jan 2013

Show Report Saturday 12^th January 2013

Bearcat Comedy Club, Twickenham.

Before Gig.

There is nothing worse than doing really well the last time I played a gig because this time I have to repeat the feat all over again. This is what I am feeling as I enter the Bearcat Comedy Club. Even if I do really well tonight but not quite as really well I did last time I was here, then I’ve gone backwards, right?  Of course the audience are not actually the same people from the last time around. So they won’t remember. They are different people sitting in the same chairs. Different people with their respective different personalities.

It may seem logical that it is a different audience but I don’t think like that. I falsely believe the room remembers my previous achievements. That the actual bricks and mortar have memory and I will enjoy some rapport with the fixtures and fittings. So I am always slightly aggrieved when I take to the stage and realize I’ve got to start things from scratch all over again.

You could argue it’s part of my job to impress people every time but frankly it starts to feel like a bit of an imposition. Maybe I should get my “own audience”. Comedians talk about having their “own audience”. Perhaps if I had my “own audience” then I could just say “well you all remember how well I did the last time.” But I imagine having my “own audience” would bring with it, its own set of problems. 

There is a green room off the stage where the acts hang out waiting to go on. Off the green room is a cubbyhole where acts can go if they want to be on their own.  I am in cubbyhole thinking I can’t get my head into gig mode. I remember the last time I was here not being able to get into gig mode and somehow I managed it. So I am trying to remember the precise way in which I couldn’t get into gig mode the last time. Why am I wasting my time thinking like this? Maybe I could use to time to write jokes or contact TV producers? 

During Gig

I greet the audience and one middle-aged man says “hello” in a deliberately idiosyncratic way that announces we haven’t heard the last from him. I will call this man heckler because that is what he is about to become.

The start is slightly rushed and while it works fine it could have worked better if I had slowed it down a tad. I mention being Scottish and at this

When I mention that I am Scottish three Scots cheer. They are – of course predictably – standing at the bar. It seems so obvious after. But I should have made a joke about them being Scottish and standing at the bar. Instead I make a joke that we have enough for a fight. This works Ok but I could have rift around the fact that they are confirming Scottish stereotypes about drinking. I then could have segued into some drinking material that I have. It would have seemed seamless. It would been seamless. Damn! I haven’t gig much over Christmas. I am rusty. I blame the Christmas holidays on that missed opportunity. Excuses, excuses, excuses.

There is some interaction with the heckler. I forget all the details. He seems a professional heckler in the sense that he will heckle in the right places: gaps where the audience are quiet and he can be fully heard. He won’t heckle prior to a punchline and thus ruin the joke. He knows what he’s doing in a good way.  I can’t fault his stagecraft. Usually after ruining a gig a heckler will tell you that they were trying to “ help you”. But this heckler is helping the gig. He was obviously experience. He knew what he was doing. I felt is safe hands.

I have a bit of material about how you can think somebody is a mate when they are a prick merely because you’re drunk and you wouldn’t put up with them if sober. I nod to the heckler at this point as if to say “you are that prick” But only the people at the front laugh and it strikes me that the gesture wasn’t exaggerated enough for most of the audience to pick up upon. I can now see the benefits of doing panto.

The better the gig goes. The more I slow the pace and the better it goes etc…

When I do the routine about having sex for the first time I over explain the set up. The first time I had sex with a woman was also the first time I had sex (I don’t count masturbation as proper sex- that’s my system)

I mean this sincerely but the over explanation is funny. I will try and recreate this moment at my next gig. I may have discovered a new joke but I may not be able to recreate the moment who knows?

I do the routine about watching TV at Christmas that ends with my mother saying to me “at least he’s on television”. The heckler then pipes up. “But you should be on television.” I adlib for about a minute around this very positive compliment – or is it? Is the heckler saying you are good enough to be on telly?  Or is he saying why aren’t you on telly you must really have mismanaged your career? I take it as a compliment anyway. But my time is already done so I have to end my set. But I regret that heckle not coming earlier because I reckon I could have got 5 minutes out of it and it would have been great. Maybe I should have just have said “fuck it” and over run? But over running can piss of people too. At the time I think I just had to get off stage because of the time factor. Later I will question that reason.

After Gig

I feel pleased as I leave the stage I feel I have done a good job but not an excellent job. I don’t know precisely how it compares to the last time I was here but I don’t care anymore. That is yesterdays story. I can’t believe I was so caught up in all that comparing the last time to this time bullshit. Now all I am thinking is –“ I should have made more of that heckle. Why didn’t I make more of that heckle? Because my time was up anyway. I had to leave the stage.  No you didn’t. You could have over run, you are just making excuses.”

 I think as I lie on my deathbed I think I will be regretting not making more of that heckle. When I get in from the gig my flatmate asked me how it went. “I should have made more of a heckle.” That is all I say.